Nothing beats plain straightforward description in a query
letter. It's when you get all fancy that you shoot yourself in the
foot. If your description sounds like a snotty wine waiter at an
overpriced faux french bistro "a clever little novel drenched in
atmosphere with an insoucient streak of historical je n'est ce quoi
circa 1832" then you've just assured me that not only is the novel not
quite right for me, it will need a trip to Lourdes to be publishable." Miss Snark
I think this is the best way she's ever said this. French menu...tears streaming down my cheeks! Hah! I so miss that gal's blog!
Anyhow, back to the point: Queries are business letters, folks. Respect the recipient and their
intelligence by writing a solid business letter. No one out there is
asking for overblown prose in the style of your torrid bodice ripper;
they are all of them asking for a business letter that describes the
book they maybe want to sell.
If you don't know what to write,
start with a synopsis of the main plot, nothing of the secondary plots.
Then look for all those examples out there and see if anything sounds
good. Search MS's site for queries that sound like yours, or for the
links she's already lovingly provided to other query letters (which I
am too lazy to go find a link for you.)
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